Writing is survival.

When a passion becomes a need, and not a want.

“You got to love it so you want it so bad that you’re pushing yourself to those limits where you simply hate it” — Nick Diaz.

Diaz losing to KJ Noons in 2007 under the EliteXC banner.

Pursue a passion that is a little unorthodox, a little unconventional, and something that is so difficult to “make it” in.

“Why do you want to be a Writer, writer’s don’t make much money. Youtube is where it is. Podcasts is where it is. Nobody reads anymore, you need to figure out something else”, said a friend of mine.

Whilst my dear friend speaks from the heart and means well, he simply will never understand the pursuit of not wanting a normal life.

I got a taste of the normal life, a desk job — I hated it.

If I was going to do something I hated, I might as well do something I love and be hated for it.

So I chose Writing.

Left everything else behind.

I don’t know the future, I can’t see the around the corner — all I know is I wake up feeling happy, and I want to continue doing it.

Constantly searching for the next topic, it’s a bug that takes over my brain and won’t let go.

It grows on me, and I’m constantly discovering for what I’ll write about next.

I can’t wait when it hits me, and everything else comes to a halt.

If I’m in my pyjamas, or dressed up —

Whether it’s 3 A.M. in the morning or 8 P.M. in the middle of dinner, I have to run to get my thoughts down; it’s a hunger that needs to be replenished otherwise I fail.

It gets to a point that I hate it, that I’ll push myself to limits where it’s absolutely painful that I’m doing it and want to continue doing it.

Even if, at times it produces no result.

It’s survival, and survival isn’t about “fun”; it’s about living to see the next day.

Why does “You have to love something to the point that you hate it”, make sense — because if I’m too comfortable doing something I love, I’m not trying hard enough.

Take Elon Musk for example, he’s had a difficult year — it hasn’t been easy for him.

Yet, he continues to fight and work.

At some point, some one would say to him — “You have Billions. Why don’t you just stop?”

Because he can’t, and one can relate to that.

His passion is to be a Great Engineer, and that gap will not be filled by the billions he’s earned — it will be filled with continuously pushing to realise his dream.

Success is not a comfortable path, nor is it something full of joy.

It’s suffering and it’s painful; but I’ve grown to love the pain.

Then there’s the “Medium-Bros”, whilst they have my upmost respect — they seem to miss the mark of what I’m trying to accomplish.

Last week, I received an email telling me exactly how to “Beat the Medium Algorithm” — I read the advice and quickly discarded it.

Because,

  • Publishing at the right “Hour”.
  • Using the most clickbait “Tags”.
  • Using the right “Image”.
  • Choosing a popular “Topic”.
  • Utilising a tacky “Title”.

Isn’t on my radar, nor is it my goal.

My goal is to write what I can be proud of, and if it gets a response — I’m grateful.

If it doesn’t, I keep writing.

I’m stubborn because I’m not changing my style to suit what pleases the masses, I’d rather build a loyal following of readers who relate to my work.

Even if it’s only ‘one’.

One is good enough for me.

Sure, I need money — but if I’m not making enough here, I have to find another way to keep the gas-tank from running out.

I might have to take up odd-jobs, which is I absolutely hate, to continue doing what I love.

It’s a compromise I have to be willing to make, otherwise I can’t do what I love and survive.

I do hope someday that I do make it, and I don’t have to work the odd-jobs on the side; but if that’s not the outcome, I have to keep doing it.

Doing it to a point that I absolutely hate it, but won’t give up on it.

— Thanks for reading!

I failed to learn the piano, so I decided I’d play the keyboard instead. //All aboard the Crazytrain.

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