President. Donald Trump reveals he had no idea “Being President” wasn’t a reality T.V. Show.
In a shocking revelation, an emotionally distraught President. Trump went on to discuss how he was tricked by Media Executives.
“Being President” was supposed to be a predecessor to his hit Reality Television Series
“You know…they came to me. They looked all so happy. Big smiles. All laughing. Showing me Viral videos of President. Obama doing Daniel-Day Lewis imitations and appearing of one my favourite comedy show “Between Two Ferns” with that lovely cuddle bear Zach Galifianakis. They said, look at him — he’s a Media Sensation. I’d missed being on Television and knew this was a bold move; so I signed on. I guess only now I see, the jokes on me, I’ve been tricked by Hollywood Executives.” — Donald J. Trump.
He details his early accounts, ranging from Tape Recordings to Hand-Written notes on his sheer dedication to playing the character of a raging lunatic leading a country on a brink of war, inspired from Stanley Kubrick’s critically acclaimed movie “Dr. Strangelove”.
He went on to stress upon the atrocities that take place everyday in the media industry. Referring to the ending of Hit T.V. Series “Lost” and the critical success of “Keeping up with the Kardashians”.
A very disappointed President. Trump went on to hug one of our reporters, a Mexican Muslim man, as tears rolled down his eyes.
“Do you really think I’d be so naive as to insult your people in real life? How could somebody even imagine such a thing. I’m the least racist person. All the labour I ever employed on my real-estate construction properties were majority Mexicans. I love Mexicans. I want to bring them jobs.”, he confided in us.
As he soon began to realise this was not what he had asked for, he finally turned to us for help — even going as far as to say, “You know that Reality Television show with Clint Eastwood’s family? How do you think he feels. A man of such great pride such as himself, being tricked into another one of Hollywood’s trickery. Disgusting. What a shame.”
He cited evidence of how he would often receive scripts and directions on exactly how to perform, claiming it is a performance deserving of an Emmy.
Whilst we attempted to bring to the President’s attention that this was not exactly believable — as he was Officially Sworn in, in-front of thousands of people.
“It was Billions.”, He corrected us, revealing how he was under the influence that the people had come to see the Television Series’ Premiere.
When asked whether he’d be willing to co-operate with us as we further investigate the matter, he assured us we have his “full co-operation”.
Shortly after, we were thrown out of the White-House by the Secret Service and informed that if we ever spoke of this ever again we’d be violated like Trump violates Fried Chicken.