As with any cultural change, positive reform happens with an agreement and acknowledgement on both sides of the argument.
Adapting a culture of dismissing the other side completely, disregarding any opportunity for assimilation, is to eliminate a problem with a short-sighted solution rather than taking a holistic approach towards raising awareness and forming a society where both sides coexist in developing a sense of humility and kindness.
I understand there’s a lack of trust, and I’m sure that it’s empowering for once for women to have a say for the atrocities they’ve suffered at the hands of the opposing gender.
Being dismissed and preyed on, would breed distrust and an unwillingness to give the other side another chance.
I struggle with trying to justify myself constantly, because of the actions of certain individuals who share the same race as me, identify with the same religious beliefs as me; but decided to act out of order — and hence left the rest of us to suffer under the same blanket of false-identity.
Whilst I understand and empathise completely for the actions necessary to be taken to give women the rights and support they so rightfully deserve, know that I too have sisters and a mother.
Sisters and mother who taught me a great deal about respect and not being dismissive.
An extreme defiance born out of dividing genders — won’t lead to assimilation. It would lead to further division and dismissive behaviour due to lack of understanding, the will to educate the future in understanding the problem.
It’s not savoury, and it’s not easy when one is constantly faced with adversity in this crucial moment of change; know that justifying the very behaviour we wish to eliminate in pursuit of bringing awareness will not be the solution.
The need to bring justice and bring awareness to the issues women face is crucial, but by dismissing men entirely will lead to only further division.
As history has shown us, many a times before — hatred only breeds further hatred.
Feminism is not a cancer, but it’s starting to appear as such to many men. Whilst we do gloat that men are finally being held accountable, know that there are men who are now too scared to even voice their opinion and will reserve it out of fear of being misunderstood.
The term “triggered” has started to circulate amongst men, who feel anything they say will upset the opposing gender.
When in fact, maybe the more eloquent solution is to have a non-confrontational conversation.
It’s not easy, of course, how could it be?
When the very fabric of trust has been shredded, and the animosity is more prevalent than it was before.
Men won’t try to understand a problem, if women are unwilling to explain it.
We know we’ve done wrong, but much like prison — castrating rather than rehabilitating, will only result in a further vile reaction.
Men will start to walk-away, in fear of being misunderstood.
Good men, will be shamed for standing beside women; because being a feminist as a man, is now labelled as being a “Soy-Boy” by men who are too afraid to acknowledge the problems at hand.
Women have suffered atrocities that countless men can’t relate to, probably won’t want to relate to — because it’s too damn hard to get a man to admit he acted like a “predator”.
It’s much easier to label people.
Men will label feminists who they do not wish to understand as “lunatics”.
Women who wish to dismiss all men entirely in the name of feminism will label them as “sexists”.
The ones who do wish to understand and support the problem will be labelled as “cucks”.
Nobody likes to listen to an individual who shouts, “ME ME ME ME ME!”.
Ever wonder why individuals who have been convicted of a crime fall back into criminal behaviour rather than seeking remorse and penance?
Because they aren’t rehabilitated and aren’t “welcome” back into a society where they wish to accomplish “change”.
Because they are stripped of their rights to “vote” and further lose access to freedom of choice in “employment”.
Nobody wants to a hire a criminal, and nobody wants to give them a second chance.
They’re not allowed an opportunity to assimilate.
Not worthy of a second look.
So they believe what they’ve been told all their life — “If society expects nothing better of me, maybe that’s the best I can be”.
Learned helplessness, a culture where one will only view themselves as how society presents them to be.
You grow up in a culture of violence, you inhibit the same the qualities — because that’s all you know, and that’s the only language you’ve been taught in order to communicate, in order to get a message across.
You become a product of your environment rather than seeking a vision outside of it, one of acceptance and one without judgement.
Why was it that “International Men’s Day” became a joke rather than a day where we openly talk about “Mental Health and Suicide Rate” amongst men?
Why was it that Ellen felt it was easier to have shirtless, well-shaped, handsome, good-looking, Hollywood-type men as a representation rather than those who struggle with mental health, obesity, unemployment, homelessness, discrimination due to sexual orientation, divorce, as examples of what “International Men’s Day” stands for?
Why was it easier to say “Every day is international men’s day” rather than acknowledge “Not all men are predators, but sure a lot of them seem to be”?
Why was it that we developed a narrative of “If you’re not with us, you’re against us” rather than “If you’re not with us, we’d wish you could at least listen to us”?
Because it’s too damn hard, because it’s difficult to communicate, because it’s easier to target a narrative rather than the root cause of the problem.
Because it was easier to be told, you just don’t matter anymore, stop whining, it’s a great time for men to be afraid.
Rather than acknowledge the cold truth that we are at fault on both sides, that there’s a balance that we wish to confront for, not an authoritative state.
Because It’s just a lot easier to be dismissive, rather than keep an open-mind in hopes to educate.